I have spent the past 15 years of my life as a professional nurse, a wife, and a mother. Life is busy, chaotic, and hectic!! The relationships that I have with my co-workers, friends, family members, and my own happiness have taken a back seat to schedules, ball games, concerts, appointments, committees, and carpools that consume my life. I had begun to feel disconnected from what truly matters and a slave to the relentless schedules and activities that are required of me to keep my career and family on track. My relationships, my health, and my happiness had all suffered because I was letting life just happen and not living purposefully, setting goals, and investing time in the people and things that really matter. I had gotten caught up in caring for others, trying to get my kids to heaven, and maybe somewhere in there squeezing in some exercise, a stalk of celery, and a shower. How could I keep going on like this and how did I let this happen???
We women are unique and complicated creatures. The multitude of things going on in a women’s brain are unimaginable. Here’s a snapshot of what’s going on in my mind at any given moment (and actually right this second) ….. Did I switch the clothes from the washer to the dryer? Do we have milk? Did my son brush his teeth this morning, last night, or even this week? If not, he will definitely need to start shaving them. Did I put Frontline on the dog? Will my husband remember to pay the electric bill today? If he likes lights he will. Who ordered the teacher gift for teacher appreciation week? Was that my job? I need to make a doctor’s appointment for my daughter’s acne and my son’s weird rash. Why does the tooth fairy keep forgetting to stop by our house? Jerk. Should I change the wreaths on the front porch to summer or spring colors? Exhausting isn’t it?? It’s all about the balancing act that women manage day in and day out.
A light went off within me several months ago ….. I am a WIFE, I am a MOM, I am a NURSE!!!! WOW … these things are important and they matter. I have the knowledge to not only make myself happy but to empower others. I have kept people alive for a living; my patients, my husband, my children. I have held the hands of strangers as they left this life. I have cried with mothers over the loss of their children and rejoiced over the birth of newborns. I have lost sleep over fevers in my own babies and scared away monsters under their beds. What about me? So I began to think …. What drives me? What inspires me? What makes me happy? I know the answer. It’s all about the moments that make me pause, take in a deep breathe, and appreciate that very second for exactly what it is. A moment in time that I will never get back. I have taken the knowledge that I have gained from being a professional nurse and focused on better eating habits, exercise, and relaxation techniques to make my body stronger and healthier. I have stopped rushing my kids to become more independent, and have tried to soak in every milestone with them and to intently study their little, ever-changing faces. I have looked at my husband and remembered why I fell in love with him in the first place, before we were just tag-teaming wild hooligans. These small changes have led me to a more purposeful and fulfilling life.
I’m slowly but surely figuring this complicated life of mine out. I’ve spent a lifetime being a woman, have a plethora of knowledge about raising children (still working on that one), the wisdom of a being a loving and devoted wife (to the best guy on the planet), and years of professional nursing experience. I am definitely a work in progress …….. but I am trying hard to soak in every moment with my little family, be as healthy as I can be, and ultimately DIE HAPPY!!!!